Today I have been sober for a month again. It feels good, but I am still not back to normal. My head is all screwed up. This time I really disconnected myself from reality. Since nobody in A.A. really wants to hear my drug-a-log, i'll post it for the whole world to see. My Mother does it anyway. I relasped on some drug store shit. A little bit of dxm. I didn't know how to get drugs anymore. That didn't last very long. I started smokin a little bit of weed and drinkin a little. Both things that I had never enjoyed the first time around. I fell in love with smokin pot. After a month or so, I decided to find some L.S.D... Found. I "tripped" a couple of times, and looked for some coke. I found it of course. It wasn't as fun as i remembered. I chased a high that wasn't there for about a week. I went back to weed. I smoked a little bit of crack in there, and ate some mushrooms and ecstasy too. In october I smoked methamphetamines for the first time ever. I fell in love again... That started another addiction. I came out sometime shortly after the new year, a new man. I was the shell of a man. A fucked up man riddled with drug addiction. I lost many friends to my meth "habit." Nobody wanted to be around me, and I didn't want to be around myself. From Jan. til April 5th I mixed a combo of pot, L.S.D., coke, crack, herion, ecstasy and meth to ease my pain. Usually had no less than three illegal substances in my body over a twenty-four hour period. I smoked, snorted, ate, and shot anything I could get my hands on... Which was anything. I'll leave out all the horrible places and people i've seen. That is what losing track of your path at three years sober can do to you.
If anyone has a problem with this... Take a look at yourself.
